As I worked with A Course in Wonders, I really could observe that there is an anxiety about heavenly enjoy within my mind. I realized this is the ego’s anxiety about losing itself. The confidence is scared to be exposed and being seen as a puff of nothingness. That’s driving a car of intimacy. We acim that concern in associations, which is sometimes estimated as fear of sexual intimacy, but it is really a fear of losing our character, our mask of individuality. It’s driving a car of having swept out by way of a wonderful enjoy, a enjoy therefore powerful that nothing people will even imagine anything as fantastic and effective!
For me personally, these are the big techniques, since it does not begin with this great awareness. It always starts with emotion like you’ve done something wrong, whether you have masturbated, taken something, mistreated some one, or there’s something in your thoughts that you have evaluated as so hideous that you do not actually want to manage it, you only want to forget about it and force it out of awareness.
Underneath those thoughts and feelings, could be the opinion that we are separated. This is actually the “secret” we hide. It really is an impossible opinion, but we feel it is correct; We’ve judged it as horrifying and have pushed it out of awareness. All unconscious guilt originates from that belief in separation. And as you actually give your self over to the wonder, you feel all those concealed values and strategies are being washed away and you eventually experience this concealed belief in divorce!